It is not really a question anymore of if I leave, but when.

The last two weeks, particularly this past week, where the determining factor.

The supervisor hollering at me for doing what GM said to do is not forgotten.

The fact that I only was given one closing shift again is not being overlooked.

The fact that I was stuck in crappy day shifts and had to do the work other day shift drivers always blow off plus my own is not being overlooked.

The fact that two weeks ago, the person who was supposed to work Sunday didn’t and I got stuck doing it is not being overlooked.

The fact that Above person is being given the prime closing shifts despite often not showing up and plus just recently being hired, is not being overlooked.

The fact they hung me out to dry last Sunday is not being overlooked.

I have no desire to rectify any of these anymore.

I am leaving as soon as possible.

And I am putting up with zero shit from anyone from DM on down.


Look, no job is “perfect.”

But it ain’t me.

I have typically held jobs down for years.

I made it a year so far in this job. And this job at its best is a difficult and dangerous one.

I ain’t planning on quitting without notice.

But this job is just not for me anymore.

While there, I will do best I can.

And if my employer fires me, I will simply gather my stuff and leave.


I just applied for a new job. It appeals to me. It also offers good benefits and a set schedule. The application was short and to the point too. I liked that.

I had not actually applied for a new job until now.

I had inquired but never actually applied, until now. If offered his job, I will take it.

Friday, Saturday and Sunday off

Free health insurance, 40(k), free food….

And money too of course.

Cell phone allowance.

And my job?

Delivery Driver, their vehicle.

This job is up my alley.

I am delivery driver.


Advice from a pizza driver, but you can do what you like.

If you want delivery or carry out, phone.

If place does not answer phone in timely manner, hang up. Try another….

If they do answer, ask the time for delivery or carry out.

Then you know what you got, mostly.

If you order online, you are truly rolling the dice.

And as always, be nice to the people, they are doing the best they can, mostly.

Also, if delivery, and you have information that will aid driver to find you, pass it on.

And leave your porch light on.

It would not hurt to have big address numbers, bigger the better.

And curb numbers, and definitely numbers on mailbox, both sides being best.

Make sure you provide correct telephone number and address too!

If phone rings, answer it.

It may be your driver….

The driver has to find you. That is harder than it sounds.



The Pizza Driver


Don’t think a plan ahead will always save you either.


Subject X: Work of X

Ecclesiastes speaks to me so much of work.

Yet teaches little really.

This is my opinion.

It does not define any wisdom just equates wisdom with sorrow.

And it paints enjoyment as folly at best.

And love?

It don’t work.



I said love.

Love, X, is what I said.

Ain’t anybody who understands that.


The Jeff Strobbe “Operating System” is in “Safe Mode.” This will last at least until this Thursday. All tasks are monitored by the chief tech, Strobbe.

Jeff Strobbe is a finely tuned machine and I can’t put that asset at risk.

So I  am checking myself.

It is better that way.

It is a form of conflict avoidance.

Conflict is like a virus.

Sometimes programs must be removed or rewritten….


Work: it is a mechanical property/phenomena they tell me. Mechanical.


It is cold.

So am I.


I could be hot.


I prefer to be warm.

I guess warm is a sort of equilibrium.


Oh and the effects/results one sees after a nuclear explosion, those are attributable to what?


Kind of ironic huh? All that work ending in complete and utter destruction.


How does X work now?

It is a legitimate question.

Anyway, try not to blow up anything ok?

I am talking to the Deep State.

They work in concert with others and stuff.


I am tired of work.




I ain’t feeling it again yet. I started to tell you about my week last week, never finished. Suffice it to say it sucked. And this week I simply ain’t in the mood for anybody’s shit except my own.

I am sick. And I am tired. And I am grouchiest I have been in years.

I make no apologies.

I ain’t gonna go out of my way for anyone this week except me.

It is my mind and body that I am attending to this week.

The rest of world except my family is not my concern at all until my mind is back at peace.

I took Monday off because I had to work on my car.

I am sick now. I need to rest.

I doubt I work tonight. I doubt I work tomorrow. Hell I may not go in at all this week.

On Sunday they stuck me on the road by myself during playoffs and and I busted my hump for thankless customers and asshole supervisors and for what?!

The GM was off for last two weeks and the slack bitches were in full effect and I picked up the slack more than I usually have to.

And then the slack bitches still get the prime GM treatment.

Fuck them all!

I am sick. I have been sick. I still went in and did my job and basically three others too.

Well now I heal up.

Rest is the only thing that significantly calms my skin irritations down.

And mentally I am not up to putting up with the burning, pain and itching.

If I have another customer get in my face right now, God only
Knows what I may do to

I had one young buck get in my face Sunday and it took all I had not to put him in his place.

I ain’t up to that now.

That is bad.

So I wait until I am.

Plus there are new drivers there. New drivers are a pain in the ass. They don’t know what to do. They fuck shit up, when they do anything at all. Mostly they just stand around with a dazed look in their eyes.

And this week, I ain’t in the mood to hold any future slack bitches hands.

And I ain’t in the mood for some asshole supervisor to ask me
To show them the ropes.

And I sure as hell ain’t in
The mood for any assholes supervisor bitching me out for checking my order.

And everybody got winter hats too, except me.

I just texted GM and told them I got my car fixed but I am sick and won’t be in tonight.

I won’t.

I told them I plan to return Thursday.

I also told them my phone is off and it is because I left charger at work. I ain’t going in to get it.

I have a basic phone so if I only turn it on when I need it, it will
Last plenty until I get my cord back.

And if my boss for whatever reason wants to bitch at me, or fire me or whatever, they can do it Thursday.

It ain’t like I would really care.

I mean it ain’t like I enjoy my job anymore.

I ain’t planning on quitting but I ain’t real concerned about losing the damn job.

I don’t enjoy it anymore, too much of a pain in my ass.


Crosman Elite P311 Airsoft

It is a 1911 clone. The safety works and is 1911 style. Plus. It has no operable grip safety, or slide stop, minuses.

It has a fairly crisp 5.5 lb trigger pull and it goes straight back like a 1911, plus and plus.

It has notch rear and blade front which I need to practice on again more. Plus.

I can practice manipulations and first shots and reload with this gun.

Cost? $12 dollars basically.

This is a pretty good practice platform for early familiarization. It is way too light by around 1.5 pounds. I wanted the all metal but it was out of stock.

But for now, pretty good option.

I notice I can shoot this “easily” one-handed. That is one solid measure/indicator of a good grip/fit.


Folks the thermal radiation radius of the bomb in question dwarfs the total square mileage of the largest Hawaiian Island and probably the whole chain. Your best bet is not to duck and cover. Your best bet is to get out of Dodge. It ain’t impossible. If you can get 50 miles away from epicenter before blast and KEEP going you may survive. The escape attempt itself may kill you.

My “numbers” are based on largest known worst case scenario, 100 Megaton yield.

The example of person in video is much lower, .01 Megaton yield.

Still the numbers he give and advice he gives is worthy of note, and planning.

The thermal radiation will burn you and dose you.

You will be hating life.

If you are in fireball radius, you vaporized….


Let us hear this Ted guy. Let us see what he says.

I am just hearing it myself. I did see in notes he mentions the “farcical” nature of many “responses” to potential nuclear attacks.

We seem to agree on that much.



It is all simulation until it is not.

And in the simulation, how do you fare over repeated reps?

Is a 9 good enough?

It is not real.

It is merely difficult.

When I score well I try to remember that I might still lose.


So you play the nine game yet? You may have saw me play it once. I scored 8. I ain’t ever scored 9, and I invented the game. Sometimes the score is much worse, even for the inventor of the game. The game is a trickster. It is.

9. I will probably score 9 soon. Maybe you will see it. If I do, what does it mean? It means I got lucky.

The game kicks my butt many times.

And I am supposedly like really good.

Stay humble….

I do.

It is a drill that is really only constant in one thing, it is difficult as hell. The game itself is problematic. The game is better left alone. But yet there seem to always be players….


Strobbe’s 9 Game


For 9 use 8 bottle caps stacked in pairs of twos. Starting at top left shoot the caps. The white cap is the same color as my sights, so hitting it is much harder. So it is worth two.

You must place white cap on top but you can place it on any stack.

If a bottom cap stays on the platform after you hit top cap, you can then shoot the bottom cap.

Each stack is worth a possible two points, except stack with white cap is worth 3, if you hit it correctly.

Knocking over a stack with one shot is one point.

Go on to next stack.

If you miss on a stack, you go on with no points from that stack.

If you knock over a stack that you are not intending to, you cannot reset that stack. You can’t score from it.

If you hit all eight possible shots, you have 9 points.

You do not have to knock caps off, merely hit them.

It is better often to knock them off as they can get in way.

You cannot score off them again.

This game is hard. On purpose.

Distance is 9 feet here. I was shooting down. You don’t have to. It is likely easier if you place targets at your eye/hand level.

But you can change it a tad, make it your own. I wouldn’t change it too much.

You can use bigger targets if you like. Use one target that has same color as your front sight. You can even add another, and game would be ten.

0-9 is the scoring range.


Lackronyms ASAP

As Secret As Possible

As Slow As Possible

As Soon As Poseebluh.

Lackronyms are packronyms of so much they say almost nothing.

I drive ASAP.

What do I mean?

As slow as possible.

Do I need to spell it out?

Your guess is as good as mine? Who knows?


A lot to check

Padded Room.
No Shrink.
No Patient.
Far Fetched.
Yet Proximal.

Forget the whole love the doctor story line.

Just focus on the driver. And that damned fast car, and the track and the competition and the fans.

It was the time before I divorced Hollywood.


After range yesterday, I stopped by nursing home to visit a former client. That was fun. They and their roommate are trying to hit me up for pizza. I told them I would have to check to see if I am allowed to give them pizza first. If so, I will hook them up.

I was telling my client about my job delivering pizza and roommate asked where I worked. They said They liked that brand. I asked their favorite.


When I arrived, the client was holding the doll baby I bought her.

Out of all her dolls, she was holding that one.

It warmed my heart more than words can say.

I really miss my former clients.

They are like family to me.

I think of them pretty much everyday.


Beretta was supposed to have fixed Beretta Pico firing pin issue. Obviously they have not. So as for now, I am forced to remove Pico from recommended. However once I fix it, I may put it back on list. It has a lot of potential and numerous configurations being modular.

I will try to reach them today. I have not yet.

I want to drive this pistol.

I am so, so bummed.

The firing pin was probably broke when I bought it. It was the display gun so probably been dry fired a lot.

Good excuse to buy a different 389 though. 😄

I tried two rounds and neither had a primer strike.

Failure to go bang is a deadly flaw.

This is something that will weigh heavily against this gun.

I didn’t try to reach them yesterday. I was grouchy. So I waited. I don’t want to holler at Beretta peoples.

I call aday before work.

The part of me that likes fixing things is excited.

The part of me that likes value is pissed.


Range Day:

I went to an indoor range today and my Pico failed to go bang. That is bad but I honestly wasn’t surprised.

So, I will call Beretta and get a firing pin and spring. I really don’t want to mail it to them.

I might. But I can fix it myself.

So I shot my Beretta 21A 22LR.

When shooting at 15 yards at numbers 1 and six I was horrible. I didn’t concentrate enough.

I let the Pico distract me.

I really wanted to shoot today.

I was disappointed in myself for my initial shots.

But when I look at what I did otherwise, I will take it.

These are mostly all DA shots. I decided to work on DA only as range requires 1 second between shots.

Ranges are not places I prefer anyway. I have to throttle myself.

I ain’t used to that level of slow….

It may actually help me though too.

And I am not happy with going 1 of 6 at 1 and 6. I didn’t do it on purpose.

That tells me that I am not allowed currently, by myself, to take “precision” shots at 15 yards with my Beretta, I am limited to ten yards, and that I need to not ever be distracted.

It also tells me I need more training and discipline with blade sights….

I should have hit all 6. I was horrible.

I hate missing. It is inexcusable.

I missed five today.

Target repaired:

Then I blasted it repeatedly at three yards with Airsoft sprinters.

I shot very well today except for five shots.

Have to fix it again now.